Oh mothers! Let us be godly and refuse the worldly perspective that is being offered by the "Experts" that claim to know the answers to our child's problems.
Let me ask you, how can they know? Who are these people that lift themselves up above the parents and claim to know better? They may be highly educated in the worldly philosophies of child psychology and development, but do they live a godly life? Do they hide the word of God in their hearts? Have they raised godly children? Are they experts in His eyes? Are they mixing the ways of the world with the precepts of the Creator, corrupting and confusing?
The sad, sad thing about this is that too many parents have abandoned their jobs as parents and have turned to pleasures and entertainment for themselves. The resulting conditions from that behavior are confused and disobedient children, many with disorders. The parents are incapable of helping them because they have abandoned them in their hearts. Since this has happened, the Community, State and Government have been obliged to step in and "help"... thus we have labels of disorders. Many are true disorders, since the child has been raised in a disorderly way. Thus the "Experts" have risen up and proclaimed to know better than the parents... in some cases they may know better, but not in a godly way.
I am alarmed at the multitude of parents who claim to be true Christians and say they know the Lord. Their children reflect the reality of what the parents truly are, revealed by their child training and lifestyle. Children mirror their parents.
Fathers and mothers who want godliness in their children, must first be godly. A godly example is vital for your children.
Let us remember that God is merciful and just, He is very compassionate to us. If we have failed in raising our children for Him, there is still hope when we seek Him and pray for mercy on our children. If your children are still young and exhibiting disorders, I would like to give you some examples of disorders and possible help for them from Scripture.
Here is an example of a disorder called:
( From: Medline Plus)...
Oppositional Defiant Disorder:
"kids misbehave some times, but behavior disorders go beyond mischief and rebellion. With behavior disorders, your child or teen has a pattern of hostile, aggressive or disruptive behaviors for more than 6 months."
Warning signs can include:
- Harming or threatening themselves, other people or pets
- Damaging or destroying property
- Lying or stealing
- Not doing well in school, skipping school
- Early smoking, drinking or drug use
- Early sexual activity
- Frequent tantrums and arguments
- Consistent hostility towards authority figures
How sad! A disorder that shows human nature unrestrained and untrained! What has happened to these children? An accurate assessment of this "Disorder" is, Leniency-- these children have had a strong will since birth and the parents have not trained nor disciplined them according to God's Word. The parents have shown great leniency to them and allowed them to: misbehave at times, harm others, damage property, lie and steal, not work, eat what they want, watch movies and T.V. that have sex and/or violent scenes, allowed arguments and tantrums, and have been a bad example of respect for authority. It is very clear in God's Word that we reap what we sow... if children are given free range to do what they feel like, it will always lead to sin and sorrow for them and their parents.
The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother. (Proverbs 29:15)
"Parents, in educating their children, must consider, 1. The benefit of due correction. They must not only tell their children what is good and evil, but they must chide them, and correct them too, if need be, when they either neglect that which is good or do that which is evil. If a reproof will serve without the rod, it is well, but the rod must never be used without a rational and grave reproof; and then, though it may be a present uneasiness both to the father and to the child, yet it will give wisdom. Vexatio dat intellectum - Vexation sharpens the intellect. The child will take warning, and so will get wisdom"-Matthew Henry
"but a child left to himself brings his mother to shame; a child that has the reins thrown upon his neck, is under no restraint of parents, but suffered to take his own way, is left to do his own will and pleasure; he does those things which his parents are ashamed of, one as well as another; though the mother is only mentioned, being generally most fond and indulgent, and most criminal in suffering children to have their own wills and ways; and so has the greater share in the shame that follows on such indulgences."- John Gill
"Left to himself - The condition of one who has been pampered and indulged. The mother who yields weakly is as guilty of abandoning the child she spoils, as if she cast him forth; and for her evil neglect, there shall fall upon her the righteous punishment of shame and ignominy."- Barnes
Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. (Proverbs 22:15)
"Pro 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child.... That is, sin, the greatest of all folly; this is naturally in the heart of man; it is in the heart of a child, it is in him from his infancy; it is bound in his heart, it is rooted and riveted in him, being conceived in sin, and shaped in iniquity; it is what cleaves close to him, and he has a strong affection for and desire after: the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth (Gen_8:21); so that he is not easily brought off of sin, or becomes wise...
but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him; the rod used by parents, for the correction of sin and folly, is a means of making children wise, and of restraining the folly that is bound up in them; and of reclaiming them from those sinful ways, which the folly of their hearts leads them to, and so in some measure of driving it far from them."- John Gill
Another Disorder is:
(From:National Institute of Mental Health)...
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, OCD:
"Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, OCD, is an anxiety disorder and is characterized by recurrent, unwanted thoughts (obsessions) and/or repetitive behaviors (compulsions). Repetitive behaviors such as handwashing, counting, checking, or cleaning are often performed with the hope of preventing obsessive thoughts or making them go away. Performing these so-called "rituals," however, provides only temporary relief, and not performing them markedly increases anxiety."
Signs & Symptoms:
"People with OCD may be plagued by persistent, unwelcome thoughts or images, or by the urgent need to engage in certain rituals. They may be obsessed with germs or dirt, and wash their hands over and over. They may be filled with doubt and feel the need to check things repeatedly"
How sad! What would make a child behave like that? If the child is exposed to things that are very wicked, such as immoral movies, T.V. , and books, perverted people, music of the world, witch-craft, the occult, and unrestrained play with children involved with such things... it would be of NO surprise that a child would have a disorder like this.
We as parents are responsible before God to be sure our children are not exposed to wicked things. Children have very tender minds, if they are exposed to evil things their minds are not able to bear, they will behave in extreme ways. This is a disorder that has been created by the parents or those in authority over this child.
Mothers, Fear God! ... He will hold us accountable in how we train up our children!
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6)
"Pro 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go,.... As Abraham trained up his children, and those born in his house, in the way of the Lord, in the paths of justice and judgment; which are the ways in which they should go, and which will be to their profit and advantage; see Gen_14:14; and which is the duty of parents and masters in all ages, and under the present Gospel dispensation, even to bring such who are under their care in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, Eph_6:4; by praying with them and for them, by bringing them under the means of grace, the ministry of the word, by instructing them in the principles of religion, teaching them their duty to God and man, and setting them good examples of a holy life and conversation; and this is to be done according to their capacity, and as they are able to understand and receive the instructions given them: "according to the mouth of his way", as it may be literally rendered; as soon as he is able to speak or go, even from his infancy; or as children are fed by little bits, or a little at a time, as their mouths can receive it."-John Gill
Prov.22:6 ...even when he is old he will not depart from it.
"You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates." (Deuteronomy 6:5-9)
"For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live sensibly, righteously, and godly, in this present world; Looking for that blessed hope, and the glorious appearing of the great God and our Savior Jesus Christ; Who gave himself for us, that he might redeem us from all iniquity, and purify unto himself a people for his own, zealous of good works." (Titus 2:11-14)
Dear mothers, if you teach your children diligently the way of God and the way he should go... He will not depart from it!
Another disorder is called:
(From: Children's Hospital Boston)...
Generalized Anxiety Disorder:
"The following are the most common symptoms of GAD in children and adolescents. However, each child may experience symptoms differently. Symptoms may include":
- many worries about things before they happen
- many worries about friends, school, or activities
- constant thoughts and fears about safety of self and/or safety of parents
- refusing to go to school
- frequent stomach aches, headaches, or other physical complaints
- muscle aches or tension
- sleep disturbance
- excessive worry about sleeping away from home
- clingy behavior with family members
- feeling as though there is a lump in the throat
- fatigue
- lack of concentration
- being easily startled
- irritability
- inability to relax
It is very sad indeed to be a parent of a child that won't trust you. This is learned behavior, that comes from some experience or incident that causes fear and lack of trust. It can also come from parents that are very busy, and do not take time with their children, or they keep the children too busy. Children need quiet times to think and learn, to be still. Too much business in the home can cause this disorder in children. The child that has this disorder has not been taught to trust in God, nor to turn to Him in all things. Not only does a child like this need to be taught to trust the Lord but this child needs to learn the fear of the Lord!
The fear of the LORD leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied; he will not be visited by harm. (Proverbs 19:23)
"Pro 19:23 The fear of the Lord leads to life,.... "Godliness", of which the fear of the Lord is a principal part, has "the promise of this life and that to come", 1Ti_4:8, the fear of God is the beginning of a spiritual life; and it leads to eternal life, as Gersom observes, and is connected with it; and he that hath it shall abide satisfied; with his lot and portion in this life; with the good things of it he has, being content therewith and "godliness with contentment is great gain", 1Ti_6:6, such a man has enough; he has all things in a spiritual sense; he is full of the blessings of goodness; he is blessed with all spiritual blessings; his mouth is satisfied, and his mind is filled with good things; and so he rests and abides night after night, and day after day; he shall not be visited with evil; nothing shall hurt him; all his afflictions, his worst things, his evil ones: work together for his good; and they shall never separate from the love of God, nor anything that befalls him in this life, Rom_8:28; see Psa_91:10."- John Gill
There are other disorders that I would like to address, and will have to do that in next post.
God bless you dear mothers that are diligently raising your children for Jesus Christ our God!
